


What good is a web when it's strung with lines of lies?

by becausenothingelsematters



Category: BBC Sherlock, MorMor - Fandom, Sherlock - Fandom
Genre: Feels, Hate, Love, M/M, Sex, lying, relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-22
Updated: 2012-06-22
Packaged: 2017-11-08 08:35:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/441258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/becausenothingelsematters/pseuds/becausenothingelsematters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lies, lies, lies.<br/>It's all it is, what use is a relationship when all it is is lies?</p>
            </blockquote>





	What good is a web when it's strung with lines of lies?

**Author's Note:**

> an RP between me and my-world-wide-web which escalated into something much bigger. hope you enjoy, and let us know what you thought? <3

I'm not stupid. -JM

[17:22:17] Sebastian Moran: of course boss -SM

[17:22:38] Jim Moriarty: I'm not. -JM

[17:22:56] Sebastian Moran: yes boss -SM

[17:23:15] Jim Moriarty: Really. Not at all. Stop humouring me and agree with me. -JM

[17:24:00] Sebastian Moran: I just did boss -SM

[17:24:28] Jim Moriarty: Sorry Seb. -JM

[17:24:57] Sebastian Moran: yes boss -SM

[17:28:15] Jim Moriarty: Slightly worrying, tiger. -JM

[17:28:25] Sebastian Moran: boss? -SM

[17:28:44] Jim Moriarty: Not many people have such an eagerness for their job. -JM

[17:28:54] Sebastian Moran: you admire that boss. -SM

[17:29:08] Jim Moriarty: That I do, but still. -JM

[17:29:34] Sebastian Moran: just /show/ me -SM

[17:29:45] Jim Moriarty: Show you? -JM

[17:29:55] Sebastian Moran: never mind -SM

[17:30:08] Jim Moriarty: You perv. -JM

[17:30:58] Sebastian Moran: jesus no! -SM

[17:31:08] Jim Moriarty: Then what? -JM

[17:31:24] Sebastian Moran: doesnt matter -SM

[17:31:49] Jim Moriarty: If it's not what I think it is, then do tell me. -JM

[17:32:17] Sebastian Moran: I thought you had a rifle for me. s'all -SM

[17:32:32] Jim Moriarty: Oh. -JM

[17:32:35] Jim Moriarty: Em. -JM

[17:32:38] Jim Moriarty: Yeah. -JM

[17:32:48] Sebastian Moran: so.. show me -SM

[17:35:18] Jim Moriarty: Yes, of course. -JM

[17:35:31] Sebastian Moran: thank you -SM

[17:36:39] Jim Moriarty: It's more of a flashy thing rather than a practical one... -JM

[17:36:47] Sebastian Moran: I see... -SM

[17:37:06] Jim Moriarty: Well, it works of course. But it's a bit... shiny? -JM

[17:37:26] Jim Moriarty: Does shiny matter? -JM

[17:37:34] Sebastian Moran: you know it does. -SM

[17:37:56] Jim Moriarty: I thought it did, I never knew it until you just told me. I'm not an expert on everything, Seb. -JM

[17:38:13] Sebastian Moran: really? huh, thats interesting -SM

[17:38:18] Sebastian Moran: im still not sleeping with you tonight -SM

[17:38:29] Jim Moriarty: WHAT? You said it wasn't cancelled! -JM

[17:38:41] Jim Moriarty: When did you decide this? -JM

[17:38:45] Jim Moriarty: You're joking. -JM

[17:38:51] Sebastian Moran: yeah, it isn't cancelled, we're changing the plans. -SM

[17:38:55] Sebastian Moran: we're going out. -SM

[17:39:05] Jim Moriarty: Oh, Jesusfuckinshit. -JM

[17:39:10] Jim Moriarty: How bloody romantic. -JM

[17:39:18] Sebastian Moran: yeah, I thought so -SM

[17:39:28] Jim Moriarty: Where to? -JM

[17:39:43] Sebastian Moran: I've got reservations for your favourite. -SM

[17:39:47] Sebastian Moran: I’m paying. -SM

[17:40:11] Jim Moriarty: Then sex? Good. -JM

[17:40:21] Sebastian Moran: no. no sex. -SM

[17:40:35] Jim Moriarty: That's not fair. -JM

[17:40:55] Sebastian Moran: yes it is. please don't argue boss -SM

[17:41:12] Jim Moriarty: I won't argue, but I'll moan. -JM

[17:41:23] Sebastian Moran: no you fucking won't -SM

[17:41:30] Sebastian Moran: we're not doing that tonight boss. -SM

[17:41:33] Sebastian Moran: you can ahrdly fucking walk. -SM

[17:41:54] Jim Moriarty: I can walk just fine. The leg's still not completely healed, that's all. -JM

[17:42:05] Sebastian Moran: stop lying. -SM

[17:42:10] Sebastian Moran: you never even broke your leg. -SM

[17:42:30] Jim Moriarty: Damn... -JM

[17:42:41] Sebastian Moran: I’m taking you out. simple as. -SM

[17:43:09] Sebastian Moran: wine for you when we get back, beer for me, then you're going to sleep after you attempt to get me to dance with you as you always do when you drink. -SM

[17:43:39] Jim Moriarty: That sounds too well-planned. -JM

[17:44:26] Sebastian Moran: just recalling from experience boss -SM

[17:44:29] Jim Moriarty: I'm not happy. I want a Burger King and I want beer and I want to swim. No restaurant, no wine, no dancing. -JM

[17:44:49] Jim Moriarty: But plenty sex. I'm not some disgusting whore, you know. -JM

[17:45:02] Jim Moriarty: You can still come near me. You won't catch anything. -JM

[17:45:04] Sebastian Moran: I know you're not boss. you ain't listening tome are you? -SM

[17:45:23] Jim Moriarty: I'll start listening when you start obeying. -JM

[17:45:32] Sebastian Moran: tough. I'm not hurting you. -SM

[17:45:54] Jim Moriarty: No. Your fucking me. There, we're sorted. -JM

[17:46:10] Sebastian Moran: no boss. -SM

[17:46:47] Jim Moriarty: If I can't walk, I can't go out. Aw, damn. That's a shame. -JM

[17:47:32] Sebastian Moran: I said I was taking you out. Never said anything about you walking there. -SM

[17:47:53] Jim Moriarty: I forgot how to fly. -JM

[17:48:26] Sebastian Moran: shut up. -SM

[17:48:53] Jim Moriarty: I'm not sitting in a fucking wheelchair. -JM

[17:49:04] Sebastian Moran: You're not.

[17:49:05] Sebastian Moran: -SM

[17:49:25] Sebastian Moran: there's a limo that'll take you privately to the door, in which I’ll be following you, and helping. -SM

[17:49:39] Jim Moriarty: I'm in the huff. I hope you can tell. -JM

[17:49:53] Sebastian Moran: yes. I can. -SM

[17:50:13] Sebastian Moran: usually promises for a good night, but I’m not letting it happen tonight boss. no matter what you do or say. -SM

[17:50:47] Jim Moriarty: Fucking /fine/. God's sake. -JM

[17:51:06] Sebastian Moran: why do you insist that I fucking hurt you boss? -SM

[17:51:30] Jim Moriarty: It wouldn't fucking hurt, idiot. -JM

[17:51:39] Sebastian Moran: yes. it would. -SM

[17:51:42] Jim Moriarty: I keep telling you and you keep ignoring me. -JM

[17:51:50] Sebastian Moran: how won't it hurt you Jim? -SM

[17:52:21] Jim Moriarty: Because I'm fine. Obviously. -JM

[17:52:30] Sebastian Moran: no you're not. -SM

[17:53:09] Jim Moriarty: You've barely been around. How would you know? You wouldn't. That's how. -JM

[17:53:20] Sebastian Moran: .... I watched over you last night Jim. -SM

[17:53:27] Sebastian Moran: you were fucking crying in your sleep! -SM

[17:53:33] Jim Moriarty: Fuck off. -JM

[17:53:37] Jim Moriarty: ...Was I? -JM

[17:53:42] Sebastian Moran: yes. -SM

[17:53:51] Jim Moriarty: Nope. -JM

[17:54:17] Sebastian Moran: Jim. just /trust/ me, for once in your god damn life. trust me. -SM

[17:54:26] Jim Moriarty: Nightmares. Mental, not physical. -JM

[17:54:53] Jim Moriarty: I'm never getting the underground at the quiet times again. -JM

[17:55:07] Sebastian Moran: you're never going anywhere without me by your side boss. -SM

[17:55:41] Jim Moriarty: Good, that's a relief. So... have I changed your mind with my unquestionable logic? -JM

[17:55:51] Sebastian Moran: no. -SM

[17:56:15] Sebastian Moran: I’m not fucking you tonight boss -SM

[17:57:04] Jim Moriarty: Fecking /why/? I've told you, I'm not hurt, I'm not infectious and I was only - supposedly - crying because of stupid nightmares about the underground. -JM

[17:57:35] Sebastian Moran: "please stop, please you're fucking hurting me you bastard!" -SM

[17:57:46] Sebastian Moran: "Just wait... moran'll here about this... please.. just stop..." -SM

[17:57:51] Sebastian Moran: shall I go on? -SM

[17:58:11] Jim Moriarty: You're talking shite. It's funny, actually. -JM

[17:58:24] Jim Moriarty: But fine, I'll humour you. Limousine, food, yeah yeah yeah. -JM

[17:58:32] Sebastian Moran: thank you. -SM

[17:58:40] Sebastian Moran: just.. one question Jim? -SM

[17:59:11] Jim Moriarty: Better make it good if you're limiting yourself to only one. -JM

[17:59:23] Sebastian Moran: where do you want to go tonight. -SM

[17:59:39] Jim Moriarty: You lied about reservations, didn't you? -JM

[17:59:46] Jim Moriarty: Burger King. -JM

[17:59:55] Sebastian Moran: we're notgoing to burger king .-SM

[18:00:00] Jim Moriarty: I am. -JM

[18:00:08] Jim Moriarty: You can eat fancy if you want. -JM

[18:00:34] Sebastian Moran: here's the deal, we go to burger king? I'll buy you a hundred roses. we go someone... nicer, I wont. -SM

[18:00:54] Jim Moriarty: So, Burger King gets me roses? Deal. -JM

[18:01:13] Sebastian Moran: you don't like flowers. -SM

[18:01:35] Sebastian Moran: you burn them every time I buy them. -SM

[18:02:21] Jim Moriarty: ...Yeah, but I like burning them. -JM

[18:02:31] Jim Moriarty: I can't burn flowers without any flowers. -JM

[18:02:37] Jim Moriarty: Burger King it is! -JM

[18:02:56] Sebastian Moran: no. -SM

[18:03:56] Sebastian Moran: come on Jim, why are you doing this? -SM

[18:04:03] Jim Moriarty: Because. -JM

[18:04:13] Jim Moriarty: I want sex. I'm not like you. -JM

[18:04:14] Sebastian Moran: ... -SM

[18:04:36] Sebastian Moran: so... you'd rather have a night of fucking, instead of actually acting like we're /engaged/ or have you forgotten? -SM

[18:05:05] Jim Moriarty: Well, we don't need to 'fuck' necessarily... what's that term you like to use? -JM

[18:05:21] Sebastian Moran: it's the only term you use. -SM

[18:05:36] Sebastian Moran: you don't do anything else. you've made it clear there's no emotion in it. -SM

[18:05:46] Jim Moriarty: Seb... -JM

[18:06:18] Sebastian Moran: boss? -SM

[18:06:44] Jim Moriarty: Don't say stuff like that. -JM

[18:07:05] Sebastian Moran: you told me not to lie to you. I’m repeating your words. -SM

[18:07:35] Jim Moriarty: They're outdated. -JM

[18:07:46] Sebastian Moran: then feel free to update me. -SM

[18:08:37] Jim Moriarty: I think you can work out the alternative to 'no emotion'. -JM

[18:08:49] Sebastian Moran: say it. -SM

[18:09:08] Sebastian Moran: tell me exactly what you want tonight boss. -SM

[18:09:25] Jim Moriarty: God, you're killing me here, Seb. -JM

[18:09:39] Sebastian Moran: no I’m not. you'd know if I was. -SM

[18:10:18] Jim Moriarty: Sebastian, the phrase is infantile and overused. You know what I want. -JM

[18:10:26] Sebastian Moran: then tell me. -SM

[18:10:37] Jim Moriarty: I just explained why I don't want to do that. -JM

[18:10:51] Sebastian Moran: I don't care. -SM

[18:11:15] Jim Moriarty: Funny how you can pick and choose when you care about me, isn't it? -JM

[18:11:50] Sebastian Moran: that's not what I said Jim, don't fucking start or I just won't come home at all. -SM

[18:12:44] Jim Moriarty: That's a bit harsh, tiger. -JM

[18:13:24] Sebastian Moran: then answer me. -SM

[18:14:04] Jim Moriarty: FUCKING 'MAKE LOVE' YOU BASTARD SON OF A BITCH. -JM

[18:14:37] Jim Moriarty: Sorry but I had to surround it with curses to try and dilute the ick of the phrase. -JM

[18:14:49] Sebastian Moran: say it, properly; and we'll go to burger king. -SM

[18:15:17] Jim Moriarty: I've changed my mind, in that case. Fancy restaurant it is. -JM

[18:15:46] Sebastian Moran: Jim. -SM

[18:15:55] Jim Moriarty: That won't work, Moran. -JM

[18:16:03] Sebastian Moran: yes it does. -SM

[18:16:10] Sebastian Moran: you know what? No. fuck it. -SM

[18:16:15] Sebastian Moran: nothing tonight. -SM

[18:16:36] Jim Moriarty: FINE. Fucking FINE. Let's go home and make some love, yeah? Yeah. Fucking great. -JM

[18:18:13] Sebastian Moran: oh fuck it. -SM

[18:18:26] Sebastian Moran: remind me boss, to never try and treat you fucking nicely alright? -SM

[18:18:35] Jim Moriarty: I was being nice! I really was trying, Seb... -JM

[18:18:50] Jim Moriarty: You know how it is. Difficult. For me. -JM

[18:18:58] Sebastian Moran: no it isn;t. -Sm

[18:19:01] Jim Moriarty: Please be understanding. -JM

[18:19:26] Jim Moriarty: You tell me all the time how horrible I am yet now you say that I find it easy to be nice? -JM

[18:19:27] Sebastian Moran: I tried. -SM

[18:19:41] Sebastian Moran: oh shut up. -SM

[18:20:06] Jim Moriarty: You only say that when I'm right and you don't want to admit it. -JM

[18:20:13] Sebastian Moran: go to hell. -SM

[18:20:28] Jim Moriarty: And that. -JM

[18:20:45] Sebastian Moran: I’m not fucking you tonight. end of -SM

[18:21:07] Jim Moriarty: Fine. I'm tired now anyway, food and wine might be alright. -JM

[18:21:12] Jim Moriarty: No fuckin' dancing. -JM

[18:21:44] Sebastian Moran: thats your choice not mine -SM

[18:22:05] Jim Moriarty: I'm sorry, right? -JM

[18:22:17] Jim Moriarty: It's just not fun being treated like an invalid. -JM

[18:22:34] Sebastian Moran: I never said you were. -SM

[18:22:52] Jim Moriarty: But you've been extra careful with me. -JM

[18:24:37] Sebastian Moran: I’m helping you. -SM

[18:24:55] Jim Moriarty: Because you think I need help. See my point? -JM

[18:25:11] Sebastian Moran: you can;t walk. im escorting you to your seat. -SM

[18:26:27] Jim Moriarty: Which is great and necessary and really lovely of you, but I don't like feeling pitiful. -JM

[18:26:47] Sebastian Moran: tough. -SM

[18:27:09] Sebastian Moran: you arm'll be linked with mine. I’ll look like nothing more than a body guard since that's all you're scared of. actualy having us seen together. -SM  
[18:27:30] Jim Moriarty: Seb, please don't... -JM

[18:28:04] Sebastian Moran: sorry boss. -SM

[18:28:20] Jim Moriarty: You don't really think that, do you? -JM

[18:29:53] Sebastian Moran: you do though? -Sm

[18:30:51] Jim Moriarty: No. Of course not. -JM

[18:30:53] Jim Moriarty: Shit. -JM

I want to come across like an evil bastard, yeah. But not to you. Not all the time. -JM

[19:12:11] Sebastian Moran: you don't. You just... as you said. You don't care, it isn't who you are.-SM

[19:12:39] Jim Moriarty: Why do you want to believe that shit? -JM

[19:13:01] Sebastian Moran: it's what you told me. -Sm

[19:13:12] Jim Moriarty: Ages ago. -JM

[19:13:25] Sebastian Moran: you don't change. It’s what makes you so... reliable. -SM

[19:14:16] Jim Moriarty: I don't change? Bollocks. 'I'm sooo changeable'; does that not ring any bells? You were there, tiger. And also, I'm far from reliable. -JM

[19:14:35] Jim Moriarty: Anyway, I hate it when you tell me I'm some heartless, uncaring prick. -JM

[19:14:46] Sebastian Moran: show me where I used those words boss -SM

[19:15:15] Jim Moriarty: I was paraphrasing. -JM

[19:16:13] Sebastian Moran: well don't. -SM

[19:16:29] Jim Moriarty: You hate me sometimes, right? -JM

[19:16:49] Sebastian Moran: no. -SM

[19:17:02] Jim Moriarty: ...All the time? -JM

[19:17:13] Sebastian Moran: I never hate you. -SM

[19:17:21] Sebastian Moran: you annoy me at the most Jim. -Sm

[19:17:36] Sebastian Moran: I could never hate you, even when you were about to shoot me. -SM

[19:18:08] Jim Moriarty: Seb... I am sorry. -JM

[19:18:16] Jim Moriarty: Oh, God. -JM

[19:18:26] Sebastian Moran: what? -SM

[19:18:39] Sebastian Moran: are you hurt? Are you okay? Jim? -SM

[19:18:55] Jim Moriarty: You're too good for me. -JM

[19:19:12] Sebastian Moran: you're stoned. Aren’t you? -SM

[19:19:28] Jim Moriarty: Don't be stupid. -JM

[19:19:58] Sebastian Moran: it's perfectly plausible with your god damn mood swings -SM

[19:21:21] Jim Moriarty: I'm a bad person. I didn't think so before, I was just having fun. Killing people isn't bad; not when it's necessary. But playing with your mind is bad. -JM

[19:21:44] Sebastian Moran: you've never had a problem with it before, you stop? You change. Don’t do that. -SM

[19:22:07] Jim Moriarty: Don't do what? -JM

[19:22:11] Sebastian Moran: change. -SM

[19:22:28] Jim Moriarty: I can't help it. Do you wish I could? -JM

[19:23:34] Sebastian Moran: no. not once. -SM

[19:24:01] Jim Moriarty: I'm sorry for messing with you. -JM

[19:24:53] Sebastian Moran: no. doesn’t be. Shut up. -SM

[19:25:19] Sebastian Moran: you feel what.... nothing, but you know what? Jim, I don't give a shit. You’re mine; that's all there is to it. -SM

[19:25:32] Jim Moriarty: I know that. -JM

[19:25:44] Sebastian Moran: so shut up, and quit apologising. -SM

[19:26:07] Jim Moriarty: I'm not heartless. -JM

[19:26:11] Jim Moriarty: DO NOT repeat that. -JM

[19:26:40] Sebastian Moran: I won't. -SM

[19:26:50] Sebastian Moran: you're a shit liar boss, you know that? -SM

[19:27:05] Jim Moriarty: Which lie are you referring to? -JM

[19:27:31] Sebastian Moran: "I’m not heartless" -SM

[19:29:30] Jim Moriarty: Oh. -JM

[19:29:55] Sebastian Moran: Jim? -SM

[19:30:15] Jim Moriarty: What is it, Moran? -JM

[19:30:27] Sebastian Moran: I love you.-SM

[19:30:38] Jim Moriarty: Yes. -JM

[19:31:07] Sebastian Moran: s'all I needed. -SM

[19:31:21] Sebastian Moran: burger king, but you ain't allowed to burn the roses. -SM

[19:31:32] Jim Moriarty: I'm still dressing up. -JM

[19:31:43] Sebastian Moran: you can do that. -SM

[19:31:47] Sebastian Moran: I like it when you do. -SM

[19:31:57] Jim Moriarty: Wonderful. -JM

[19:32:12] Sebastian Moran: still no fucking you. -SM

[19:32:32] Jim Moriarty: Of course. -JM

[19:32:48] Sebastian Moran: you’re gonna hire someone, aren't you boss? -SM

[19:33:04] Jim Moriarty: WHAT? -JM

[19:33:33] Sebastian Moran: to fuck you? -SM

[19:33:44] Jim Moriarty: Seb... this is painful. -JM

[19:33:58] Jim Moriarty: NOT physically. Not talking about that at all, actually. -JM

[19:34:11] Sebastian Moran: what? -SM

[19:40:28] Jim Moriarty: Oh, never mind. -JM

[19:40:44] Sebastian Moran: I'll be round in a minute to pick you up.-SM

[19:40:51] Jim Moriarty: Yeah, fine. -JM

[19:41:09] Sebastian Moran: don't sound to fucking happy about it will you? -SM

[19:41:38] Jim Moriarty: If you say so, Sebastian. -JM

[19:41:58] Sebastian Moran: you ready? -SM

[19:42:19] Jim Moriarty: No. 'Cause I'm fucking useless, remember? -JM

[19:42:39] Sebastian Moran: when did I say that. Quit twisting my words or I’ll cancel tonight altogether. -SM

[19:43:27] Jim Moriarty: I never said you said it. They're my words. -JM

[19:43:47] Sebastian Moran: you're not useless Jim. -SM

[19:43:58] Jim Moriarty: I can't put a fecking suit on. -JM

[19:44:10] Sebastian Moran: look, just... wait I’m coming up now. -SM

[19:44:42] Jim Moriarty: 'Wait'? What choice do I have? But yes, fine. -JM

[19:45:58] Sebastian Moran: unlock your bedroom door Jim. -SM

[19:47:32] Jim Moriarty: No. Can't get up. Unlock it yourself, mister sniper. -JM

 

Jim huffed petulantly against the headboard and threw his phone to the end of the bed, where it accidentally slipped and fell to the floor. He swore and grumbled to himself.  
Sebastian Moran: he started typing out a reply, before hearing the familiar sound of the phone being thrown across the room. "fucking bastard" he muttered to himself, kneeling in front of the lock as he took his time opening it, it had been a while since he had picked a lock; making a mental note to practice it, he pushed the door open to see Jim layed half naked, half dressed on the bed.   
"You really couldn't be bothered to get dressed boss?"

 

Jim Moriarty: "I tried," Jim snapped. He refused to look at Sebastian, keeping his arms folded across his chest - which he'd managed to pull a shirt onto. But the shirt was the same one he'd worn a few days ago. The only reason he had reached it was because it lay on the floor right by the bed. He hated wearing the same shirt twice without it being cleaned.

 

Sebastian Moran: "alright, calm down." he made his way across the room to sit beside Jim, his eyes cast over the body, his thighs bruised, he couldn't bring himself to imagine the pain hidden behind Jims body.   
"gimme your hand boss, come on. sit up." he kept his voice soft and quite as he lay his hand out for Jim to take, ready to get him dressed.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim breathed loudly through his nose and turned his head away from Sebastian. He reluctantly let the sniper take his hand and straightened up a little bit. He knew he stank and he knew he looked like shit. It didn't make him feel any better with the fucking perfect Sebastian sitting right beside him in all he Godly glory.  
"Burger King is next to Sainsbury's."

 

Sebastian Moran: "you haven't moved at all today... have you?" he started to worry, Jim never wore the same shirt, he never didn't take a shower, and he certainly never didn't get out of bed. "Jim? how... how badly did he hurt you? and don't fucking lie." he felt the tears form, the lump in his throat form as he saw more, darker bruises appear in places he hadn't been able to see.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim rolled his eyes and shrugged away from his sniper.  
"I'm /fine/. I just woke up, that's all. Tired from the..." A sick smile spread across his face. "Commute." He may have been raped only yesterday, but he was more than willing to make jokes about it. Especially now the culprit was dead. Sebastian was so good to Jim. Too good.  
"Sainsbury's sells nice food."

 

Sebastian Moran: "let me see." he stated, no longer caring about any form of plans that they had for tonight, even if he had put himself through the agonising torture of putting a suit on just for Jim's appreciation. He could feel the anger burn through his veins as he turned Jim by his shoulders, waiting for the man to cooperate.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim complied unhappily and finally let his eyes flash up at Seb. He wanted to convey something along the lines of hatred, but couldn't manage it.  
"Leave me alone," he muttered, adjusting his shirt and making an attempt to slide his legs over the side of the mattress and replace his shorts - a stolen pair from Sebastian's drawer - with proper trousers. He hurt, but he wasn't letting Sebastian see that.

 

Sebastian Moran: "fuck sake Jim, I can see you're fucking hurt! just stop this alright! just stop!" he was angry, it was spilling out to Jim, he just...he needed to know, he needed to. he placed a hand against Jim, slowly intertwining their fingers with each other, resting his head against Jims shoulder, letting one tear escape; praying Jim hadn't seen.   
"please..." he begged.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim sighed, still fuming but perhaps not so expressively. He shifted his shoulder slightly, but not enough to get rid of Sebastian - he didn't really want him gone.  
"What do you want?" he asked impatiently. He felt useless and used. He wasn't his own best friend in the first place, but with nothing to do but sit around all day and think about /things/, Jim's mind had slipped into a darker place - if that was possible.

 

Sebastian Moran: "to look after you, stop pushing me away Jim..." he couldn't raise his voice from the half-whisper it delved in. he wrapped his arms around Jims waist, disallowing him from removing himself, yet he kept his grip loose, he didn't want to 'cause any more pain. He used a touch that was gentle, sensitive; a touch one should use when they first have their girl.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim frowned and a twist of irritating guilt wrenched at something inside his chest. Stupid.  
"Let me get dressed. Burger King and Sainsbury's both close at nine." His eyes wandered unseeing about the lower hemisphere of his vision, his low mood affecting his line of sight. Heavy eyelids he could easily blame on grumpiness or fatigue; Sebastian didn't need to know that the nightmares hadn't dissipated once the sleep had.

 

Sebastian Moran: "fuck it Jim, you can't get out of bed. I'm cooking." he commented, pulling away to look Jim in the eyes, yet he couldn't quite find the man he loved in there, he was hidden. "Jim.... what's going on in there?" to anyone else this would be a casual flirtatious comment, but to the two men sat on the bed, arms entwined, it was more, it meant so much more that even they couldn't begin to describe the meaning behind it.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim gave Sebastian the standard look. But he felt the need to say something. Even if he couldn't say the word 'sorry' itself, he wanted to apologise a little for his behaviour. Seb didn't deserve this shit.

"You know I can't answer that," he said, offering a light laugh to ease the tension.

 

Sebastian Moran: "then try..." he whispered, resting his forehead against Jims, he closed his eyes, wondering if this would ever end. if Jim would ever learn to just talk to him. "I love you, you know that boss?"

 

Jim Moriarty: A shiver crawled from somewhere in Jim's arms - where they were touching Seb's - all over his skin until it culminated into a physical shake of his head. He laughed at this unintentionally before falling serious again.  
"Don't call me boss," he said gently. "Come on. I'm up for going out." He punched Sebastian playfully and added, "You promised me a limo."

 

Sebastian Moran: "Jim...” his voice was half-hearted, knowing there was no changing the mans mind, he stood with Jims hand in his own, pulling him to stand, debating where to go from here.”fine, but if you show me everything when we get back, alright?"

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim frowned but a small smirk tweaked his lips. He leaned away, as if checking Sebastian's sanity.  
"Show you everything? At least wine and dine me before making such propositions." He rolled his shoulders, ignoring the ache, and forced himself to make his way over to the wardrobe. He pulled out the first pair of trousers he could see and roughly hauled them on, overbalancing occasionally. He wouldn't look at Sebastian as he did so in case eye-contact might be misconstrued as asking for help.

 

Sebastian Moran: "shut up." he teased, standing in the door way as he watched Jim dress himself, 'maybe he's just being a lazy fuck Moran, quit panicking, he doesn’t need you; so stop it now.' he thought to himself, forcing a smile on his face, unable to justify the suits for a burger king.   
"come on boss, let’s go."

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim pulled a face.  
"I'll take my time, thanks very much," he said, his voice overly clipped just to wind Sebastian up. "The limo won't leave without us, surely. And to hell with Burger King." He sat on the floor to pull on his shoes - his shirt didn't match his trousers and his trousers didn't match his shoes - but he didn't care. He looked a state but he got to his feet again and gave Sebastian what he hoped seemed a relatively normal smile.

 

Sebastian Moran: giving him an sure look, he beckoned for Jim to come over to him before realising it wouldn't happen that way, he made /his/ way over to Jim, taking him backing his arms, burying his face in his neck.   
"then it can wait a minute longer." he answered, giving to indication to his intentions as he just stood there taking his criminal in.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim squinted up at his sniper, having not opened his eyes all day. He batted the man's face dismissively and stepped aside to move past him.

 

Sebastian Moran: /fuck/ knowing that Jim had had enough of him; he took the caring boyfriend image away, quickly replaced by the sniper.   
"limos waiting outside, ready and waiting for your orders sir." his voice was stern, his body language taking on more of a solider image, yet too relaxed to be disciplined.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim smirked to himself before spinning round - with some difficulty on his sore legs - and seizing Sebastian's face in both hands to yank him down to Jim's level. He crushed a violent kiss onto the sniper's mouth and grinned against it.

 

Sebastian Moran: knowing this was a game, he pulled back, refusing to allow himself to melt into the kiss.   
"timing's boss, if we do not leave immediately, we'll miss your plans boss." his heart was racing, eyes showing how eager he was for more, the only thing keeping the ability of showing the soldier-sniper was the hurt that Jim was clearly in; no matter how hard he tried to hide it.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim's grin fell away from his face like water from a hard concrete wall. Sebastian might as well have just shoved him away. Jim was repulsive; hadn't he known it? Sebastian was just too kind to say so. Jim pulled himself together and joined Sebastian in the professional act.  
"Fine, yes, let's get going." He tried to stride out first as he was used to doing, but it was made more difficult now. He pressed on, however, still trying to convince Sebastian that he really was fine.

 

Sebastian Moran: a limp, small but visible.   
"oh just fucking quit it boss. I'll go get it. get back in bed and stop pretending you're okay." he had to admit, he felt hurt that Jim didn't trust him enough for this....  
"get back in bed. I'll be back in a minute alright?"

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim stopped walking. He would have insisted that he did so because /he/ wanted to, not because Sebastian had asked. But that would have been a lie.  
"What? Bring the limo to my room?" he snorted, wrinkling his nose and shoving his hands in his pockets.  
Sebastian Moran: "just get back in bed." he calmed his voice, reciprocating Jim’s actions, ensuring to crease the expensive suit as much as possible. "you're hurt, can you at least pretend you trust me enough to admit it boss?"

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim groaned and rocked back on his ankles despite the slight ache it caused. He stared up at the ceiling to arrange his thoughts and when he gave up with that he said, "No pretending involved, /idiot/." He moodily sat on the end of the bed but utterly upright.

 

Sebastian Moran: "I really... never mind. what you want to eat boss?" he asked, watching him as he flinched just sitting on the bed. every inch of him longed to stay and look after Jim, to take care of him, it was plain he had barely slept, but he wouldn't bring that up.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim narrowed his eyes out of curiosity.  
"What were you about to say?" he asked.

 

Sebastian Moran: “I really... fancy a double bacon cheese burger?" he half asked, hoping Jim would drop it, despite being in pain, and tired, he could still be deadly. Maybe that would be more beneficial, if Jim took it out on Sebastian, then he wouldn't take it out on himself, so Sebastian pushed him further. “I lied, I actually was going to say ' I really don't think that's the truth boss, we both know you don't trust me further then you can throw me'"

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim froze and his respiratory system apparently immobilised for a moment. When he eventually started breathing again, it was in long, drawn out, heavy breaths. He stared at Sebastian in silent despair. How could the sniper say such a thing? Surely he didn't /believe/ it?

 

Sebastian Moran: he threw a half smirk, noticing jims behaviour; he was winning. besides he deserved the punishment; he let this happen, he failed Jim.  
"isn't that correct boss?"

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim wrenched himself up from the bed and staggered over to the sniper, no longer bothering to hide his limp or his anger. He pointed right under Sebastian's face, nearly jabbing him but not quite.  
"Don't be so fucking stupid!" he spat.

 

Sebastian Moran: "yes boss." he commented, neither accepting nor denying what Jim was saying between his words. He would push him as far as he could until he was sure that Jim was safe from himself. Jims' Sebastian no longer existed; he hid every bit of emotion towards Jim as far away as possible, returning to the simple position of a disloyal sniper.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim, seeing that this was having absolutely no effect, soon gave up. He was normally more persistent but he couldn't continue to fight someone who wouldn't fight back or someone he couldn't just kill. He let his hands dropped to his sides and he slumped to the ground, sitting there limply and staring into space.

 

Sebastian Moran: that... was unexpected. Certainly not the reaction he wanted.   
"Jim?" he cared too much to pretend for too long, he was worried. Kneeling beside him, he took Jims face in his hands, caressing his cheek with his thumb, hoping to look as apologetic as he could.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim warily met his sniper's eyes after a moment.  
"Why do you say these things?"

 

Sebastian Moran: "I wanted you to hurt me" he stated, not giving any inclination towards an explanation, he sat before him, crossing his legs, gliding his hands down jims arms until they met with his hands.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim frowned down at their touching hands. He didn't take hold of Sebastian's despite the huge desire to.  
"That's a stupid thing to want," he commented quietly. He couldn't understand Sebastian, even though he appeared to be just another ordinary person. Jim even found it easy to suss out Sherlock, because the man was so hell-bent in his causes that his actions became predictable when watched on a regular basis. But Sebastian? Jim couldn't begin to fathom the man.

 

Sebastian Moran: "not if you stops you hurting yourself Jim." he whispered, feeling the tug of hurt as Jim refused to take his hands, even a small flinch away from his touch he detected.   
"look... go back to bed. I guess... you're probably safer without me beside you hey? I'll keep watch on the other side of your door alright?" he shook his hands once, looking down as he bit his lip, slowly standing, letting Jims hands slide from his own. tonight hadn't gone as planned.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim hung his head and sighed in such a way that he was pretty sure the sniper wouldn't hear. He hoped not, anyway.  
"Don't go," he stated pathetically, his voice barely above a whisper. He took his own hand and imagined it to be more calloused and big - Sebastian's. It wasn't a good replacement, no matter how able Jim's imagination.

 

Sebastian Moran: he froze in his step, wishing things would just be easier between them." come 'ere Jim." he stated, moving around him, picking him up from the floor until he was standing, yet he could still the see the pain in jims eyes as he looked at him. "don't fight me alrigh'?" he asked, before moving to pick Jim up bridal-style, carrying him back to the bed before laying him down fully clothed. "I won't leave."

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim hated being transported like a commodity and he was extra sensitive to this now more than ever, what with yesterday's occurrence. But he was dependant on Sebastian for now and he was glad to be taken care of, even if he still felt pitiful.  
"I fucked up," he said in way of an apology, grabbing Sebastian's wrist to emphasise his point.

 

Sebastian Moran: "no, I did. shut it alright?" he let his wrist slide from Jims grip, replacing it with his hand, intertwining their fingers, smiling as he looked down at Jim. "go to sleep kid yeah?"

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim pulled an unamused face. He yanked Sebastian down and hissed, "I'm not feckin' tired."

 

Sebastian Moran: "yes you are, you've hardly bloody slept. look at you!" he stated, the temptation of softening the dry lips with his own too large to pretend like it wasn't there. “please Jim?"

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim's arms were not sore, much to his gratitude as he jabbed under Sebastian's ribs.  
"I've slept plenty," he insisted.

 

Sebastian Moran: "oi stop it it!" he chuckled, moving to lay next to Jim, Jim may be lying about being tired, but Sebastian had no trouble showing he was. “sleep with me Jim"

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim bit his lip in mock-confusion, his sarcasm about the emotion shielding his genuine bewilderment. "As in...?"

 

Sebastian Moran: "go to sleep Jim. " he stated, closing his eyes after moving closer towards Jim, wrapping an arm around him, wishing Jim would do anything instead of just lay there, hold his hand, kiss him. anything.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim tensed his shoulders and made himself as rigid as a board. He smirked at the immaturity of the action. He /was/ tired, but he would gladly force himself to stay awake for Sebastian.

 

Sebastian Moran: "fine." he commented, lazily rolling away from Jim, bringing his hands to his pillow, smirking as he knew he was winning.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim sat up, wincing since Sebastian wasn't looking, and glanced down at his sniper for a silent moment. He prodded the man's shoulder.  
"Tiger."

 

Sebastian Moran: "mhhmm?" he replied, refusing to open his eyes or move in retaliation.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim brought a hand up to cover his mouth, hiding his embarrassed smile from the sniper who wasn't even looking. He felt terrible about the whole thing.  
"Uh, Seb? Don't get angry, okay?"

 

Sebastian Moran: " 'bout what boss?" he replied, opening one eye as he turned half way to see Jim with a hand clamped over his mouth before rolling back over, eyes closed shut again.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim got to his feet on his side of the bed, distancing himself from Sebastian and getting closer to the window in case a quick escape was required.  
"I lied."

 

Sebastian Moran: "about?" he asked, genuinely interested and slightly worried. maybe he was seriously hurt, or maybe Jim had... no, he wouldn't? would he?  
"Jim" he sat up in bed, turning to face Jim completely.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim rubbed his right arm with his left hand to distract himself for a moment and to delay the reply.  
"Um, you didn't kill some rapist yesterday," he explained slowly, checking his sniper's expression from under his own brow, which was low as he tipped his head forward as if in shyness.

 

Sebastian Moran: "you.... fuck sake Jim." he stood from the bed, Jim didn't need to finish his sentence. he strode over towards him, fiddling with something in his hand. as he got to Jim he took his hand in his own, looking straight into his eyes with a dead-pan set. "it's off Jim." he turned away from him, the anger in him boiling, yet he was too shocked to act upon it, he left one small object in jims hand, the one that had left his own.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim grabbed Sebastian's wrist and tugged at the man's fingers, forcing the ring back on. He then took hold of the sniper's shirt front and held him in place, looking up at him.  
"I had to do it," he said quietly. "You don't come home for days or when you do, it's while I'm out or asleep. I had to do it."  
He shrugged and let go of Sebastian, no longer looking at him properly.  
"It backfired. I wanted to..." he hesitated and made a face before manning-up and whispering, " _make love_ with you, but it wasn't going to happen unless something big came up. It was all I could think of."  
His face burned with humiliation. Sebastian was the only person Jim could ever feel embarrassed in front of.

 

Sebastian Moran: he shook his head, hiding his face in his hands before snapping himself back into place.   
"we're done Jim. go to hell." he commented, throwing the ring to jims feet before leaving the room but unable to leave the flat he locked himself inside the bathroom, slamming the door shut with a bang that echoed throughout the entire flat. yet the thud of Sebastian’s body hit the floor as he crumbled into pieces was a sound no man should make.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim balled his fists into his eyes and cried out, his wail choking in his throat before it could make any proper sound. He sank to the floor and rocked, hands moving up into his hair which he pulled at anxiously. He couldn't believe he'd just done that. He lied about lying. Of course he'd been raped, he was far too proud to ever let people think he had been violated unless it was true. But he thought that if it had all been a lie, then Sebastian wouldn't be so scared to come near Jim.  
No, that was wrong. Jim hadn't 'thought' at all. He's just blurted something before his brain could catch up. This usually worked in his favour but, like everything, Sebastian was the exception.

 

Sebastian Moran: he couldn't move, think breath. everything was a blur. Jim didn't care for him, he didn't want him; he would throw him to the side the instant someone better came up. he crawled to the bath, setting the water on the highest heat before filling the tub with hot water that surrounded him fully clothed. he needed to feel something, and physical pain was all that was left.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim dragged himself into as upright a position as he could manage before balancing one hand on the wall. He padded from the bedroom and recalled vaguely the sound and direction of his sniper's angry footsteps. The bathroom, yes. Jim would have done the same, although for a probably far less worthy reason than Seb.  
It took painfully long for Jim to reach the bathroom door; not only were yesterday's injuries - two of which being minor stab wounds in his side - taking their toll but the sheer sweeping /emotion/ of it all caused his legs to grow unsteady. He wasn't used to this much fucking feeling.  
"Sebastian," Jim called cautiously through the door, knocking it with a hesitant row of knuckles.

 

Sebastian Moran: he ignored the voice completely. laying completely motionless as he allowed the water to spill over the edge of the tub. what did a little water damage matter when the man laying in it was next to dead? did a beating heart really count somebody as alive when it was torn into a million pieces? did a 'working' brain class somebody as alive when it couldn't function because the heart wouldn't allow it?

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim hadn't the strength to batter the door down. He rested his forehead on it instead and sighed heavily before stupid, unintentional tears burned down his reddening cheeks. He hated himself more than ever.  
"Please, Sebastian. I only said that so you'd be less worried about touching me," he attempted to reason. But even Jim knew his words were useless. As useless as he.

 

Sebastian Moran: he ignored him still, submerging his head under the water a he clamped his eyes shut, he stayed there for as long as he could until the burn of lack of oxygen could be felt coursing through his entire system. finally, he felt something other than death, although; he would welcome that, he wanted nothing more than to have never met Jim moriarty. he would have rather died on the streets of London then be in the turmoil he was in now. rushing to the surface, coughing and spluttering he lay his head back against the tub, refusing to turn the taps off.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim felt his socked feet dampen as water emerged from under the door. Normally he'd start shouting about how Sebastian was ruining the expensive hall carpet but now wasn't the time, and it never even crossed his mind.  
His weakened limbs wouldn't like it, but Jim had to do something. He looked around, searching for something to knock the door in with. He saw nothing. Holding his breath and bracing himself back against the rail of the stairs, he flung out his legs and sent them crashing through the door. He fell to the floor, all energy drained.  
"Shit..."

 

Sebastian Moran: he was back under the water; he heard a thud but recalled it as a heartbeat misheard. this time, he'd stay for longer as the boiling hot water turned his usual pale skin a deep red, his clothes clinging to him. Jim didn't need him, so he certainly didn't need to be alive.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim crawled through the shallow puddles of scorching water and clung to the side of the bath as if it were his life raft. He reached down into the water and grabbed the first thing his hand met before hauling Sebastian up with all his might. He had no might to speak of, but Sebastian wasn't allowed to die.

 

Sebastian Moran: he wasn't ready to surface, so when oxygen hit his face it shocked him, pushing the object away from him as his hair clamped to his face, covering his eyes.   
"what the hell Jim! I get it alright? I'm nit fucking good enough, now just piss off!" he shouted, grabbing Jim by the shirt he hoisted him up, pushing him against the nearest wall, taps still running, he gritted his teeth. "I quit." he spat, releasing Jim throwing a hurt look as he saw that Jim still wore the wedding ring that entrusted every single one of his lies.  
Jim Moriarty: Jim couldn't help it. It wasn't him. But it was. It really was. Maybe he should stop denying it now. Maybe then they'd be happy. Maybe then everything would be alright. Maybe then Sebastian would finally love him.  
Jim cried.

 

Sebastian Moran: "just fucking quit it already Jim. the games up you can quit acting. you /hate/ me, I understand. now just fucking stop." he commented, his voice filled with hatred, hurt and a touch of worry as the tears seemed to take a realistic tone in the body language of the hunched man.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim dragged the back of his hand across his eyes to try and get rid of the horrific tears. Ugly. Jim had been reasonably decent-looking enough before and maybe that was also one of the things stopping Sebastian from leaving. But now Jim was crying, he was ugly and that would push Sebastian over the edge into going and never coming back.  
His breathing ragged and his shoulders shaking, Jim nodded and refused to look away from his sniper despite the pain it caused him to see that beautiful face contorted in such rage. Tears continued to sear down his face even though he was constantly wiping at them now, flicking them away hastily.

 

Sebastian Moran: "whatever Jim. I’m done. go get... whoever it is to comfort you. I’m sure he's a better shag than me, I was stupid you know? to actually think you could care for me, for anyone! god, how fucking gullible, I played right into your game didn't I? game well played Jim. You've successfully killed a man without anything more than words. congradu-fucking-lations." he turned to walk away, but something snapped in him, he took the nearest object he could, throwing it at the window smashing it to pieces, next? the mirror, the shards scattering throughout the entire floor. he kept going, smashing and breaking anything in the room until he fell to a crumpled heap on the floor, breath escaping him. the man was exhausted.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim closed his eyes when the destruction began. He waited until the sounds stopped before opening them again and spotting the sniper huddled on the soaked floor. He wanted to join him, but thought better of it.  
Then he thought better of that.  
He trod carefully through the shards and splinters of furniture he no longer cared about. He knelt beside Sebastian but the pain of the position was too great. He collapsed next to Sebastian and sighed.  
"Fuck dignity," he mumbled to himself.

 

Sebastian Moran: "go away Jim." he whispered, unable to move any part of him except for the tears that fell from his eyes that burned a deep red. the water still running it remained the only sound in the entire flat for a long time until he managed to draw himself from the abyss, a gentle tinkle being heard as he removed his dog tags from his neck, considering the one intended with a smirk before removing it, placing it in jims lap.   
“I’ll be leaving now sir."

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim needed to know.  
"What do you believe right now?" he asked desperately.

 

Sebastian Moran: "nothing." he commented, and it was the truth, he believed in nothing, not even himself. he looked anywhere but at Jim, mainly at a shard of glass that shown him his reflection rippling in the water.   
"death."

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim's eyes widened. He clamped his hand around Sebastian's ankle and swore that he would not let go, even if it spent the last of his energy and willpower. He /would not/ let Sebastian go.  
"Don't do this. I love you."  
The words sounded false even to him so what hope was there for Sebastian to believe them? Of course Jim meant them, but nowadays everything he said sounded like a lie. He didn't blame Sebastian for wanting to leave. Jim wanted to leave, too, but he was stuck with himself.  
His hand released Sebastian's ankle. If he really did love the sniper, he wouldn't force him into enduring Jim's pathetic, dishonest life alongside the broken criminal.

 

Sebastian Moran: "no. you don't." you replied, his voice breaking as his emotions broke him to pieces completely, the true realisation of everything hit him as he turned to face Jim, one question begging to be asked.  
"why?"

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim was dead on the floor. Not physically, but emotionally. There was no need to lie anymore; there was no pride to protect.  
"I love you because you are the only person who loved me back. Well, it seemed like it. And even if you didn't then I still love you for pretending. It's the best, most generous thing I've ever been given and I don't even deserve it. I don't want this to go on. I don't want to keep hurting you. I just can't seem to help it. I think it would be better for your health if you left." Jim made sure that last sentence was spoken louder and clearer than the others. If he could do anything right now which didn't need his deteriorated body, he could save Sebastian with his words.

 

Sebastian Moran: "even now.... fucking hell Jim, just stop! you always, always fucking contradict yourself! just tell me; plain and simple, right now? the truth, about everything. tell me now or I walk out that door and never look back." his voice was stern, he cared too much about the child-like figure that lay in front of him, yet if he wasn’t to take a stand, they would get nowhere. It was here and now; that would make the final decision.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim closed his eyes and steadied his breathing, preparing for Sebastian's departure and the slow, agonising grief Jim would force himself to endure before killing himself. Now /that/ was something he deserved.  
"I was raped by some guy on the train the other day. I was too proud to tell you but you were persistent. I told you. You sorted it, as always. You were lovely, as always. I wanted more than that, so in my greed I lied and told you I wasn't raped so you would still love me. But it didn't work."  
He had no idea whether Sebastian would believe this, but Jim was ready now to hear those familiar footsteps quieting as they increased the distance between the sniper and his boss.

 

Sebastian Moran: "that the truth?" he questioned to bewildered by anything to even start to believe the words, but they had to start somewhere

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim gave an almost imperceptible nod. His words were dying in his throat as he let the world crash around him without its pillar to support it.

 

Sebastian Moran: refusing to admit defeat, he let his hand slide to the floor, where the tips of his fingers overlapped Jims. "okay." he commented in a harsh whisper, unable to think straight.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim tightened his grip on Sebastian's hand and clung to it. Seemed his body was still capable of taking care of itself after all; when his mind had closed itself off to Sebastian, his body knew that the sniper was the only thing he had left.

 

Sebastian Moran: he refused to return the grip, biting his lip he stared at the ceiling just wishing it would collapse on him, begging it to in his mind. he was caught, he couldn't leave; but he couldn't stay with someone who didn't love him.  
"why did you keep pretending you cared boss?" the words had slipped out before he had time to catch them.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim let out the faintest of groans before it built up. His vocal chords scratched painfully as the noise became loud, mournful. He squeezed his eyes shut and continued to yell. There was nothing he could do anymore to convince the only person who had put up with him to stay. He arched his back and used his grip Sebastian's hand to haul himself up. He collapsed forward into an odd sitting position and sighed with the immense effort.  
"Sebastian..." he thought over and over again, possibly out loud.

 

Sebastian Moran: he flinched as the man finally snapped, he watched as he moved himself, collapsing to the floor; his emotions forcing his body to rush forward and catch the body. he cradled the man in his arms, burying his face against his chest. "I love you Jim." he admitted, the emotions crashing over him; no matter what happened or how hard he tried to deny it; he loved the man with all his heart.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim let his head loll against Sebastian's shoulder. He had misheard the sniper, of course, but it was sweet of his own imagination to at least try and make him feel better.  
The proximity would have allowed his arms to take Sebastian and never let him go, but there was just nothing left in him to make such a large movement. He kissed Sebastian's shoulder - if this was the last time he could show his affection, it didn't matter that it was given to such an insignificant and unthankful part of Sebastian.

 

Sebastian Moran: "fucking hell Jim.... I love you." he repeated over and over again as if to re-convince himself. as he felt jims lips press against the soaking cloth he pulled him tighter, refusing to let go, he needed this man more then he needed his own body to live.

 

Jim Moriarty: "You can go," he breathed, eyes flickering open and head shifting back slightly to catch sight of Sebastian's face. It made him have /emotions/ but he no longer gave a shit. He would suffer all the emotions in the world if it meant Sebastian experienced only one: happiness.

 

Sebastian Moran: "no." he knew he'd grow to regret this but this was his life now, the games were what he craved. this fixation of....Jim was what took him off heroin and fuck, there was no use denying it... "I love you, I love you Jim and I’m not going anywhere."

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim's face broke into an ugly, tear-streaked grin, his catching breath making his laugh sound even worse than it usually did. He just sat there and watched, /and felt/, Sebastian holding him.

 

Sebastian Moran: "you've gotta stop this Jim... you've gotta or we're going to be torn apart, you know that...." he whispered gently against the man’s ear as he pulled him against his chest, stroking his back, half rocking both of them as he hid his face in jims hair.

 

Jim Moriarty: "I'm sick," Jim said, regaining enough energy to at least respond with coherence. His hand came up to rest in the crook of Sebastian's neck between his jaw bone and shoulder muscle. The heat and wet did not have the same effect on him as it usually would. He couldn't afford lust right now - it was a luxury and he didn't want it. He just wanted Sebastian. Simple.  
And yet he continued to fuck it all up.  
"I'm sick and I can't..."

 

Sebastian Moran: "sick? Jim...?" he was worried already, less than a minute ago he would have left this man dying in a street, but now..."Jim... what’s wrong?"  
Jim Moriarty: "In the head. People don't do this to their favourite." He frowned at himself and chose a far more appropriate term. "People don't do this to the person they love. I must be sick."

 

Sebastian Moran: "that... I’m not going to deny that Jim. but it's you. come on, getup, I think we both need to sleep..." he half whispered closing his eyes as he felt his fingers finally allow themselves to lock with jims.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim let Sebastian control his movements since he couldn't do it himself.  
"I'm so sorry."

 

Sebastian Moran: "shut up." he ordered, picking Jim up since the man looked more drained then him, he stumbled through the flat, Jim in his arms until he collapsed against the bed, soaking the sheets. "sleep. we'll talk tomorrow." he commanded, not wanting to play any more of jims games.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim's shaking hands came up to cover his face and he felt like his head was about to implode. He ruined everything every time it was getting good. And he didn't even mean it.  
"Sorry for the slight change of plans," Jim mumbled through his hands with a humourless laugh. For all he knew, Sebastian had left.

 

Sebastian Moran: he didn't answer, he simply rolled towards Jim, resting his head on his chest, before closing his eyes. Jim would never pay him back for this; it would just go unsaid, unmentioned.

 

Jim Moriarty: Jim's hand fell onto Sebastian's head before he knew it had happened. Maybe he should let his body be in charge more often; it obviously knew far better than his mind what was best for him.  
"Goodnight," he murmured as his eyes closed properly and the energy finally vanished totally from him. He slept.


End file.
